Penpal Program
Childhood is a time of life where kids on the autism spectrum and their siblings can feel very isolated. The children on the autism spectrum themselves can feel isolated because they're more likely to have difficulty making friends, more likely to get teased or bullied at school, and more likely to not feel accepted by society as a whole.
The neurotypical siblings can feel isolated because, well, life with an autistic sibling is different from the lives of other children and it's unlikely they know anyone else who can relate. Not to mention, they may feel a little left out at all the "special" things their sibling gets to do. I know I felt left out when Caley got to go play all these cool games with the therapist and I didn't! Now, of course, I can look back on that with a fond smile, but at the time it seemed rather unfair.
What to do to fix this? Well, there are many ways to help, but the one I've come up with is this penpal program! I can't think of a single child who wouldn't get excited over the idea of having a penpal. At the very least, even if the idea doesn't take off with the kids (it's hard to sustain many childrens' interest for long) it gives the child a chance to feel special and know there are other kids like them out there in their situation. And if it works, it's a chance for your child to work through the role of autism in their life, to make a friend, and have someone to talk to and relate with.
I've actually done trial runs myself penpaling with neurotypical siblings and it's gone quite well, well enough for me to make this program larger scale.
Although I've probably caught your attention already, there are some bonus benefits to this - children who penpal will be practicing reading, writing, and spelling without knowing it!
There is an additional mentoring program starting where kids on the spectrum can get paired with adults on the spectrum.
To keep the program safe, though, there are some rules of participation.
1. By entering your child into this penpal program, you are promising to only allow communication to flow through a parent's email, and to have a parent read every new email from a penpal prior to allowing a child to read it. That's just to keep things safe and make sure kids aren't talking about inappropriate things.
2. If at any time you think that what the children are talking about is unacceptable and you want to cut off the program, stop allowing your child to receive their penpal's emails and email me. If it's something specific to your family's beliefs, etc, I will attempt to smoothly transition the child to another penpal or even to penpaling with myself. However, if a child is making threatening or bullying remarks or saying anything at all unsafe, I need to know so that I do not inadvertently and unknowingly transfer them to penpaling with another child.
3. If you notice, in reading the emails, that your child is saying some bad things about autism or is confused about it, etc, please shoot me an email through the contact form and I'll make a guest appearance in their communications and clear up whatever issues arose. The last thing I want is for this program to inadvertently reinforce stereotypes or negative images of autistic people.
4. This program is for children only. No one over the age of 18 is allowed to participate, although I'm considering opening up a separate adult penpal program in the future.
By using the forum and participating in the program, you are signifying your acceptance to follow all the above outlined rules, which are subject to change, and accepting all liability for your child's communications. If you still wish to participate, use the forum below to seek a penpal or mentor. Please state your child's name, grade level, gender, whether or not they have autism, a parent's email that will be monitored, whether you're looking for the penpal program or would be open to having an autistic adult mentor your child, and any additional details in your forum post.
The neurotypical siblings can feel isolated because, well, life with an autistic sibling is different from the lives of other children and it's unlikely they know anyone else who can relate. Not to mention, they may feel a little left out at all the "special" things their sibling gets to do. I know I felt left out when Caley got to go play all these cool games with the therapist and I didn't! Now, of course, I can look back on that with a fond smile, but at the time it seemed rather unfair.
What to do to fix this? Well, there are many ways to help, but the one I've come up with is this penpal program! I can't think of a single child who wouldn't get excited over the idea of having a penpal. At the very least, even if the idea doesn't take off with the kids (it's hard to sustain many childrens' interest for long) it gives the child a chance to feel special and know there are other kids like them out there in their situation. And if it works, it's a chance for your child to work through the role of autism in their life, to make a friend, and have someone to talk to and relate with.
I've actually done trial runs myself penpaling with neurotypical siblings and it's gone quite well, well enough for me to make this program larger scale.
Although I've probably caught your attention already, there are some bonus benefits to this - children who penpal will be practicing reading, writing, and spelling without knowing it!
There is an additional mentoring program starting where kids on the spectrum can get paired with adults on the spectrum.
To keep the program safe, though, there are some rules of participation.
1. By entering your child into this penpal program, you are promising to only allow communication to flow through a parent's email, and to have a parent read every new email from a penpal prior to allowing a child to read it. That's just to keep things safe and make sure kids aren't talking about inappropriate things.
2. If at any time you think that what the children are talking about is unacceptable and you want to cut off the program, stop allowing your child to receive their penpal's emails and email me. If it's something specific to your family's beliefs, etc, I will attempt to smoothly transition the child to another penpal or even to penpaling with myself. However, if a child is making threatening or bullying remarks or saying anything at all unsafe, I need to know so that I do not inadvertently and unknowingly transfer them to penpaling with another child.
3. If you notice, in reading the emails, that your child is saying some bad things about autism or is confused about it, etc, please shoot me an email through the contact form and I'll make a guest appearance in their communications and clear up whatever issues arose. The last thing I want is for this program to inadvertently reinforce stereotypes or negative images of autistic people.
4. This program is for children only. No one over the age of 18 is allowed to participate, although I'm considering opening up a separate adult penpal program in the future.
By using the forum and participating in the program, you are signifying your acceptance to follow all the above outlined rules, which are subject to change, and accepting all liability for your child's communications. If you still wish to participate, use the forum below to seek a penpal or mentor. Please state your child's name, grade level, gender, whether or not they have autism, a parent's email that will be monitored, whether you're looking for the penpal program or would be open to having an autistic adult mentor your child, and any additional details in your forum post.
