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Sometimes Good Things Don't Feel So Good...

4/10/2015

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When I took a child I was taking care of to get a haircut (and I had tried SOOOO hard to do everything I could to prepare him) he started screaming when he saw the scissors and trying to run away from me. So I'm running after him in this hair salon, praying he doesn't run out the door and into the parking lot. I catch him and try comforting him and he tells me, for the very first time, "I'm scared!" And when I asked him why he said, "Hurts." (Referring to the haircut.) God, I was so happy that he could express himself like that, but knowing how he was feeling broke my heart.

I'm going to be honest - I broke down bawling in the middle of the hair salon and had to be comforted by the hairdresser (who was, in fact, the mother of a child on the spectrum herself, hence the reason we chose that salon). I know, as a nanny, people don't expect you to care that much about the children, which probably contributed to the hairdresser's surprise at my tears, but I love all the kids I work with dearly and to see them afraid or in pain - even if it's a great milestone in expressive language, it breaks my heart. Sometimes good things don't feel so good.

To read about the eventual successful haircut we had (which was not that day, I assure you), and what we did to make it successful, read about what we have dubbed "The Lego Trim" here:
http://www.autismspectrumexplained.com/…/autism-and-haircut…

To read about the other things I'd tried (this was written about what I'd done right before my salon breakdown), read this post:
http://www.autismspectrumexplained.com/…/autism-and-haircuts

For some background on the haircuts, for anyone who is interested, we had probably five different only semi-successful (or completely unsuccessful, in the case of the one I wrote about) haircuts before we found the recipe that worked for him. But now that we've figured it out, he is doing SO much better with haircuts and what was once a traumatic experience is now one he requests! (About a month ago he wanted to go see a movie and when I told him not today he said, "Maybe after haircut." He knows that's one of his rewards and he was actively seeking it out to get to what he wanted!) It's a story about the importance of not giving up until you find the formula that works best for the child involved.

How about you all - have you had any experiences like this?

-Creigh

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    About Creigh

    I'm a college student who grew up with my Autistic younger sister, Caley. I've got a bachelor's degree in Psychology and I'm currently studying for my Master's in Speech Language Pathology.

    Neither of those, however, have given me an understanding of autism. All of my understanding comes from learning from the many autistic people that I know. As a result, I have a very different outlook on autism than most, and a burning desire to tell the world what I've learned. This blog is one of the many areas in which I attempt to do that.


    *Note, none of these make me a professional, so advice I give is not professional advice.

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