Originally published 3/17/14
In the autism community, the pronoun "we" is used too much. This is a problem I've noticed and I'm uncomfortable with coming from both sides of the community. I already posted on the ASE Facebook page about my discomfort with "The Reason I Jump" in which the autistic author claimed to speak as "we autistics"...even though not all autistic people would agree on what he was saying. I had the same discomfort with the article discussed by Diary of a Mom, What Parents of Autistic Children Will Never Tell You, which used the "we parents" phrase. And these are only two tiny examples in a much wider problem.
I do not seek to devalue Naoki Higashida or Jo Worgan or any of the many, many writers and speakers who have spoken as "we ____" when I say this. Their words, their experiences, their right of expression, these are all valuable things. I learned from what Naoki and Jo wrote and I would never desire them or any one of the other authors who has employed "we" to stop writing, or to feel like they were under attack for their slip of a pronoun.
It's not their fault and I do not write this to shame or silence them. They were trying only to help, to express their very valid thoughts and feelings about what it's like to be a part of the autism community, and to help others in their situation who they assumed felt the same way. In many cases, they thought rightly, and their words have certainly resonated with many, though not all.
But we, and I do mean we, need to change this idea that one person can speak for everyone, this assumption that our experiences are alike. Because we are a very diverse community and while it is important that we speak for ourselves, it is equally important that we not put words in the mouths of others.
-Creigh
In the autism community, the pronoun "we" is used too much. This is a problem I've noticed and I'm uncomfortable with coming from both sides of the community. I already posted on the ASE Facebook page about my discomfort with "The Reason I Jump" in which the autistic author claimed to speak as "we autistics"...even though not all autistic people would agree on what he was saying. I had the same discomfort with the article discussed by Diary of a Mom, What Parents of Autistic Children Will Never Tell You, which used the "we parents" phrase. And these are only two tiny examples in a much wider problem.
I do not seek to devalue Naoki Higashida or Jo Worgan or any of the many, many writers and speakers who have spoken as "we ____" when I say this. Their words, their experiences, their right of expression, these are all valuable things. I learned from what Naoki and Jo wrote and I would never desire them or any one of the other authors who has employed "we" to stop writing, or to feel like they were under attack for their slip of a pronoun.
It's not their fault and I do not write this to shame or silence them. They were trying only to help, to express their very valid thoughts and feelings about what it's like to be a part of the autism community, and to help others in their situation who they assumed felt the same way. In many cases, they thought rightly, and their words have certainly resonated with many, though not all.
But we, and I do mean we, need to change this idea that one person can speak for everyone, this assumption that our experiences are alike. Because we are a very diverse community and while it is important that we speak for ourselves, it is equally important that we not put words in the mouths of others.
-Creigh
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